I always dread this date on the calendar for so many reasons. Mainly being that I can still feel the sorrow and the ache that I felt that day, looking down at my 6 month old baby and knowing this was the world I had just brought him into.

I can’t help but reflect on the way our nation came together 13 years ago. It wasn’t perfect, but it was as close to patriotism as we’ve been in many years.

Fast forward 13 years and our country is in turmoil except this time, we’re our own worst enemy. There are people in this country that don’t blink an eye when we go to war in another country but refuse to acknowledge the multiple wars going on right under their noses.

The war on women.

The war on refugees.

The war going on in the streets of Missouri right now; the war between the races.

Ultimately, its all a battle of what is right and what is wrong based on your definition of those two things.

I don’t think even sitting back and remembering how we felt as one the day we watched our country under attack will help people stop for one second and think about the pain we’re inflicting on each other today.

I’m saddened by the thought that we’ve really learned nothing.


The Countdown Begins

Let me take you back, if you’ll allow me, way back, back into time. Or all the way back to my last post where I had just finished my very first mud run. Just scroll a bit past this post and you’ll see it there. See how I had said I had already signed up for a few more runs? Well… the countdown is on.


Four more days and I feel like puking. Because in 5 days, I’m running my first Spartan race.

Everytime I think about it, my stomach does a little flip flop and I think there’s a slim chance I might throw up a little. Because Spartan scares the crap out of me and I don’t think I’m ready for it.

This is, of course, me psyching myself out because physically, I am probably ready. I’ve been working out consistently and doing crossfit once a week and let me tell you, crossfit is awful guys. Anyone who says its awesome is lying or brain damaged from dropping a weight on their head or something because it’s pretty much terrible. One plus is that it doesn’t take long so you only feel like you want to throw up or die for a short period of time. But then you can’t walk for two days and you have to start questioning your life choices.

Come to think of it, this is just fitness in general that makes me feel this way. But my heart is getting stronger and I feel better and yadda yadda why can’t I just sit on the couch and eat cheesy bean dip all day?

Oh right. I workout so I can eat all the cheesy bean dip I want.

So there it is. Spartan in 4 days. And then a 5k the weekend after and then a trip to NY and NO RACES… until October anyways.

Side Note: I usually open up my post after a long absence with HEY I’M BACK or some other form of acknowledgement but I decided this time around that I would just blatantly ignore yet another huge gaping hole in my archives with the hopes that everyone else will too. Did it work? Did it work until I wrote this? Either way, don’t look behind this curtain. I’m still a huge smoking talking head. Or whatever.

Some Days You Just Have to Get Down and Get Dirty


Have you ever done a mud run? I’m sure you’ve heard of it at least. A few friends did one a few years back when I was no where near in shape or sick enough in the head to consider something so outrageous so I had a general idea of what it entailed. Apparently, the general idea is that you run. In mud.

Except you don’t just run in mud, you run a whole bunch and then you take on these crazy obstacles like climbing things, and jumping over stuff, and oh yeah, crawling around in the mud; A lot of gross, dirty, mud with some muddy water and rocks thrown in. It’s so glamorous!

I was talked into my very first 5k Mud Run by one of my bestest friends I’ve known pretty much forever, Michelle. She thought it would be FUN. She’s always been a little crazier than me if you can believe it or not. When she asked if I wanted to do it, I figured, why not. It would be great to see her and do something crazy again and this was the perfect opportunity.

In the days leading up to the race, I was trying not to think about what I had gotten myself into and the night before I was like, you are crazy! What were you thinking! It didn’t help that I was sick the days leading up to the race so I wasn’t very thrilled with my life choices.

We arrived at the park that the Merrell Down and Dirty Mud Run was being held. The whole place was buzzing with people ready to get down and dirty. We got our bibs, our Merrell shirts and headwraps for participating. (I just love headwraps and headbands for running. They are awesome.) We checked our bags in the free bag check area and we waited for our run time.


Once 10:00 rolled around, we got in line to run. The queue was full of nervous energy. They were letting the runners go in waves, so as not to crowd up the obstacles, which is smart considering there were so many people there to run the race. Right as we were waiting the last two minutes, I got really pumped up to run. Once they blew the air horn, I was ready.

This was a 5k race so there was a lot of running, running, running. Running down paths, thru tunnels, up hills, up a huge hill and there were obstacles randomly along the way. The first was the Monster Climb which is two levels of ropes you have to go up and come right back down. As you’re running up to it, you just see a ton of people climbing all over it like spiders and you think, “oh crap, I need to get up there too don’t I?”

And then you just do it. And it’s much easier than it looks because you’re much stronger than you think. That was pretty much my entire attitude during the race. First thought was self doubt and then all of a sudden, I just thought to myself, “Oh. I got this!” Finally near the end, I was thinking, “when is the next mud pit?!”


There was only one obstacle I faced when I thought, “nope, this is the one I won’t be able to do.” It was called the Slippery Mountain. It’s not at all mountain shaped but because they are pouring soapy water all over it as you’re trying to climb it, it’s pretty hard to get a grip. All you can do is pull yourself up and over. I have weak arm strength and after I had grabbed the rope I laid there and thought “well, this was just too hard.” Then another mudder started pushing my feet, giving me a boost. Another mudder was at the top telling me I could do it and holding their hand out. I started pulling myself up, pushing with all I had left and with the help of those people, I got over the edge. I couldn’t jump down without helping the person who gave me that push in the first place. As I ran to the last giant mud pit, I was so excited. I jumped right in, crawled through it, actually having to dip my face into the mud to get under the ropes and it. Was. So. AWESOME. I was determined to get to the end even though my knees were getting killed by tiny rocks and the mud was freezing.


Running to the finish line, there’s a giant line of people holding their hands out for high fives. I jogged past them all and got as many as I could because damn it, I had earned it. I was literally dripping with mud and I didn’t even care. As I crossed the finish line, I gave Michelle a huge hug, got my dog tags, and I couldn’t stop smiling. It was total euphoria.


I finished in 1 hour and 25 minutes.


Even though I felt sore all over the next few days, I’m absolutely doing this again. I can’t wait to find the next high that comes with finishing a race like this. The thing that I would change about this particular race would only be the fact that the bag check is soooo far away from their changing tents. That was a lot of walking for someone who just killed themselves in the race. Otherwise, I thought this race was very well organized and a great experience for anyone who is interested in doing a mud run. Michelle and I already talked about doing next years and maybe even going for the 10k. As much as that terrifies me now, I’m not going to let it hold me back.

I’m already signed up for 3 more in the coming year. See you in the mud!