I don’t know where to start.

I’m sitting here, memories blurring one into the next, thinking of all the things I could tell you about going to Chicago. It’s hard to find a starting place.

I’ll start with this: I have not had such an emotional, powerful, and uplifting weekend in a long time. I’ve never walked away from something feeling truly lucky to be as loved and to love as much as I did this weekend.

The best part of the past weekend to me was something simple. At any given time, I could pick up the phone, or knock on a door, and one of my best friends was behind it. I could walk through the lobby, or into a room, and run into someone who’s blog I’ve been reading for years. I could reach out and hug people that I loved, because they were real, because they were right there for me to touch. The barrier of keyboards and screens that kept us apart had disappeared. It may sound corny, but it was such a blessing. Instead of an @ reply, or a comment on a blog, I was breathing the same air as they were and living that blog post, or that twitter update in real life.

I learned so much. I learned about my ability to deal with situations as they presented themselves. I learned that some people go places and they have priorities that do not include me, that some people have agendas that they embarrass themselves over in order to complete. I learned that some people are truly sincere, and how it feels to have someone get incredibly excited just because they are standing next to you. (The feeling? Was so mutual. Even if she is a classy bitch.) I learned that some people who annoy you online are incredibly awesome in person. And vice versa. OMG VICE VERSA.

Yes, there was drama. I don’t really want to discuss it because it didn’t really concern me. I’d rather tell you about walking around the streets of Chicago and laughing at Wacker Street with my friends. I’d rather tell you about the free whiskey I got to drink. I’d rather share the story of the dress that caused all my girls to keep a vigilant nipple watch. They did such a good job. But a little nipple never hurt anyone right? (haaahahaha)(very possibly my new tagline, FYI) I’d rather tell you how beautiful and romantic that city was, and how I fiercely ached for the guy who I was closer than ever to, yet still so far away from. Who, I should mention, rocked my very world by sharing some ideas of his future with me.

By the end of the weekend I was exhausted. I laughed too hard. So hard my cheeks hurt. My arms ached from hugging so much. My heart was spent from swelling with love, and then breaking into a million pieces as we drove away from the curb on Sunday morning. My eyes still fill with tears when I think of having to say goodbye.

My favorite city in the world is San Francisco, but there’s no doubt that I left my heart in Chicago.


This is what I want everyday. Lunching with my ladies like its the most natural thing in the world. You all have a piece of my heart.

See you bitches in New York.

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